Need some revisions done on this

Need some revisions done on this paper about culture. Most of the corrections needed are citation errors. I am attaching the paper, full directions, and then what needs correcting

DIRECTIONS:

A. Write a statement of purpose for your research project on subcultures living in your state.

• A statement of purpose is a sentence that defines what you want to learn about in your research project and acts as a guide for your research.


Note: Your statement of purpose will go into the introduction of your paper. (See D1 below)


B. Locate and gather sources of information from the library, the Internet, interlibrary loan, or from organizations that directly represent the cultures you wish to study.


Note: This information will be used in your paper and cited in section G listed in APA format and identified if it is a primary or secondary source.


1. Secondary sources: Locate at least two non-Internet sources on each culture (four sources total). Seek various types of sources (e.g., textbook, library monograph, brochure, etc.). Do not include encyclopedias as part of the four required sources.

2. Primary sources: Locate at least three sources for each culture (six sources total). Seek various types of materials (e.g., pictures, documents from authoritative bodies, poetry from members of that culture, etc.).

Note: Do not use personal interviews as a source.


a. Include at least one primary source for either culture from the Internet.

b. Include at least one primary source for either culture from an official government or public policy source (e.g., U.S. Supreme Court or U.S. Department of Justice, Civil Rights Division), which are available on the Internet at sites indicated by *.gov rather than *.com or *.edu.


C. Create a concept map or an outline for each culture (two maps or outlines total) and upload them with your research paper. Each concept map or outline should represent at least three common themes, concepts, and ideas (e.g., beliefs, foods, arts and entertainment, educational aspirations, political tendencies, traditions, family life, holidays, languages spoken). Use the same 3 themes for each culture.

• You can find explanations of concept mapping and outlining on the Internet by entering “concept map” into a search engine.

• If you create the concept maps by hand, scan a copy of each map and save the images as JPEG files. If you use software, such as Inspiration, save the file in either Rich Text Format (*.rtf) or in JPEG format (*.jpg).


D. Write an introduction (suggested length of 1–2 paragraphs).

1. Place your statement of purpose at the beginning of your introduction.

2. Identify the cultures you researched.

3. Briefly describe the common themes, concepts, and ideas of each culture you will address.


E. Write a results section to describe each culture (suggested length of 1–2 pages per culture).

1. Present the information you found on each culture. Use the three themes you used to create your concept maps.

2. Cite any information you include using APA in-text citations.


F. Write a discussion and conclusions section (suggested length of 1–2 pages).

1. Discuss how the two cultures are similar (at least two similarities) using the information you researched.

2. Discuss how the two cultures are different (at least three differences) using the information you researched.

3. Explain at least three specific ways the information found on the two cultures from this project could be applied in a classroom.


G. Create a reference list in APA format. Be sure to identify each source as primary or secondary.


Note: Make sure that the sources you site on your reference list are also cited in your paper.


H. Clearly describe the materials and methods you employed (suggested length of 1–2 paragraphs).

1. Briefly describe the methods you used to find your resources.

2. Explain by name which sources were most important and why.

3. Describe how you reviewed and synthesized the information you found in the sources.

4. Describe why the report is important to you personally and as a teaching professional. Explore your feelings and make connections between the information you learned and your future as a teacher.

Corrections needed:

B1. Comments on this criterion: While four non-Internet secondary sources are listed in the reference page, only two are cited within the work. Two non-Internet secondary sources must be utilized for each culture

B2. Comments on this criterion: Only one primary source is cited within the work for each culture. It is also important to note that blogs cannot be used as part of the required sources since they are not considered academic sources.

D3. Comments on this criterion: A brief description of the three common themes is needed in the introduction. Please also clarify what is meant by stating that Hispanic and African American cultures share the same month to celebrate who they are and what they represent.

E1. Comments on this criterion: Useful and interesting information is presented. However, the common themes are only briefly discussed. It may help to provide a separate paragraph for each theme (similar to the format presented in the outline) in order to ensure that each theme is fully developed. Each theme should be developed from the research with the needed documentation being included.

E2. Comments on this criterion: There are a number of sources listed in the reference page that have not been cited within the work. For every reference listed in the reference page, there must be at least one corresponding in-text citation.

F1. Comments on this criterion: Documentation for a source addressing Hispanic Heritage Month is provided at the end of the paragraph. However, documentation is needed for each culture to support the similarities regarding dancing/music and fight for equality/hardships.

F2. Comments on this criterion: Differences in family and coming to American are noted, but documentation is not included. A third documented difference is needed as well

G. Comments on this criterion: Errors are noted regarding used of author initials, use of a hanging indent, and capitalization of titles and subtitles. Also, some publication dates are not in parentheses.

H2. Comments on this criterion: Please provide the names of the most important sources, and explain why they were found to be particularly beneficial.

H3. Comments on this criterion: How were the various sources reviewed? What methods were used (note taking, highlighting, outlining, etc.) to collect and organize the useful information.

H4. Comments on this criterion: Please elaborate on how the research about these specific cultures is important as a future teacher. Please also explain how the research is important on a personal level.